Thanks for visiting my little blog, Please note that this is my online diary, thoughts & feelings expressed on this blog are mine & mine alone. I hope that you will take the time to comment & tell me what you think about the things that I write. If you do not wish to know what I am thinking in my tiny little head then please do not read on, but I will not apoloize for my spelling (although I'm trying to be better!) or my posts!

Thanks for stopping by,
Princess Steph

Friday, January 28, 2011

What if your psychiatrist doesn't want to change your meds??

I had my second appointment this month today with my psychiatrist where I left frustrated, angry and quite frankly mad.  I went to the appointment with a laundry list of issues in my life, primarily that I am not sleeping, anxious all the time and quite down. The worst part is that it is a circle that spirals downwards and I know it.  I am not sleeping, I get crusty, I worry about work, my anxiety sky rockets, I start to shut down, the work piles up, i worry more, I lose more sleep, blah blah blah.....

So for the second time this month i met with my psychiatrist, who i really like, I explained what was going on, including the fact that I had an anxiety attack on Wednesday, and no offer of a change on any of my meds.  I know that meds are not the answer, and that there are many things that I can do to help me to feel better, and I am trying to do those things, but I do believe that a change in my meds would likely help.  If nothing else, than at least a sleeping pill to conk me out at night would be greatly appreciated, please and thank you.

I am just frustrated with not being able to express my feeling of need and "distress" to my psychiatrist. Does she think that I am making it up?  Does she think that I am just trying to get some sleeping pills?  I just don't know, but I feel like an idiot as this being the second time that I have had the exact same appointment and left with the exact same outcome.

So what is a girl to do????  I rely on my psychiatrist for meds.  Right now I am self medicating with some Clomazepan that I have and I take when I really can't sleep or I am just too anxious.  I am not drinking this month, so thinking of having a couple of glasses of wine, as a self medicating measure, is not in the cards (on that note, i also know that I am not being affected by caffeine either as I gave that up also).  I am lucky that I have a second psychiatrist that I can go to, and i have called to ask and go and see him.  I hope that when I meet with him he will be able to give some clarity on meds and maybe help me go in a bit of a different direction.  I would appreciate a second opinion and hope to get it at least.

For now, I am trying to sleep when i can.  Trying not to self medicate.  Trying to get as much exercise as possible.  Trying to work effectively.  Hoping that this next appointment w Psych #2 will provide some answers.

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